For those of you who don't know, I'm engaged. My fiance is graduating tomorrow and moving three hundred miles away to start a career and set up a home for us. We plan to get married three semesters from now, when I'm finished with my bachelor's degree. This means our relationship is going to undergo quite a bit of change. Right now, he's my 'battle buddy.' If life is a battle, then he's right next to me through all of it, helping me handle things and supporting me when things get tough. When one of us has too much to handle, the other takes care of the little things in order to help the other person through their tough time. We do pretty much everything together-- homework, laundry, dinner, youth group, church etc. We share life with each other. And in two weeks, that connection will change.
And I'm freaked out about it. It's hard to know that you were going from having a battle buddy to being alone again. It's even harder to know that you're going to have to continue doing the life that you were doing together all by yourself. I've been praying about it, asking God for help and comfort, and it really didn't seem like he heard me. I've been afraid that the relationship that I have will just fall apart if we can't share day to day life anymore.
Then on Saturday night (Sunday morning?) I was trying to go to bed. It was 2:30 in the morning, so you'd think I'd fall right asleep. Instead, I laid there for awhile, turning a lot of stuff over in my mind. I kept feeling like I needed to go for a walk, but it was 2:30am. That's crazy talk! I don't wander around at night anymore. But then it was 3am and I still felt compelled. So I put on my rain gear and I went up to the water tower where I always go to pray. As I was praying, I felt like God was telling me, "So. You have faith to walk out of your house at 3am and wander around in the dark, but you don't have faith that the relationship I gave to you will work out? You trust me with your life and not with your relationship?"
It's true. It feels like I can trust God easily with the big things, when I feel God calling me to do something, I do it. Take a walk in the middle of the night, have a conversation with this person, take this job,give this person your bible, etc. Things that I have little investment in. Sometimes they require a lot of faith. And I jump without even thinking about it. It's a no brainer moment for me.
And then I have things I really don't have faith about. Things like relationships, roommates, school. I have little to no faith that God will take care of those things the same way that he will protect me on a late, dark night. And I don't know why. Sometimes I blame it on seeing God the same way I do my father-- that God cares about the same stuff Dad does, and doesn't care about the same stuff Dad doesn't really care about. But other times I think it's because I have a huge investment in things like my relationship, school, etc. I really care about those things. And because I really care about those things, I don't want to let them go. However, who ever loves his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for God's sake will find it.
So perhaps I need to start giving over those high-investment areas and having faith that God, who is even better than my earthly father, wants to give good gifts to his children, and has good plans ahead of me. Yes, I may not know how or what or when or why, but maybe I should start having faith and believing Romans 8:28 and Jeremiah 29:11.
"For I know the plans I have for you, sayeth the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11
"All things work out for the good of those who love God and who are called according to His purpose." -Romans 8:28
Friday, December 7, 2012
Monday, December 3, 2012
The Mission Field
It's almost Christmas time. This means that as a church, and as a Christian society, we're focused on God. Probably more than the rest of the year, because this is a season dedicated to Jesus and his Birth. It's easy then to think about His life and His sacrifice on the cross, so this season becomes a season of peace on earth and goodwill towards men. It's a season of grace. It's a season of giving.
For students, this is a time off of school. For adults, this is is a time of a break from the work force. As such, it's a time for missions. Many college groups I know are sending students abroad to do Christmas missions in foreign countries. They want to spread the Gospel to people who need it. They want to tell people the true meaning of Christmas, to show God's love to people that need love, and are more willing to receive it at this time of year.
One of the ONLY things that bothers me about this concept is the idea that people feel the need to leave the country to do that. Foreign Missions are an amazing thing, and I love seeing students sacrificing their precious time off of school in order to bring people to Christ. I think it's amazing to know that people are willing to walk into perilous conditions to spread the Gospel, and my prayers go with them. If I had money, it would go with them too.
However, sometimes I feel as if our churches focus more on foreign outreach than on neighborhood outreach. The mission field, our mission field has been defined as a place that is far away. To do 'missions,' you need to have the funds, the time, and the desire to travel. I don't necessarily agree with that. I believe that our mission field is right here. I take the same bus to school every day. I stand at the bus stop with the same people, every day. For fifteen weeks, three times a week I have stood next to the same girl, and I have never said a word to her. Why not?
I go to the same classes, with the same students every day. I see the same people and I even have conversations with them. And yet, I don't know if they're struggling. I don't know what they go home to. I don't know if they cry themselves to sleep every night, or if they're dealing with loneliness, depression, or achoholism. I don't know how many of them feel neglected by their parents, or are surrounded by things and yet feel like there's something missing.
I don't know how many of them don't know the true meaning of Christmas. I don't know how many of them truly are willing to receive Christ... And I've never asked. I feel like we often assume everyone has heard of Christ, knows what Christianity is, and has already made up their mind. What if that's not true? What if they never were exposed to it? You can know something exists without fully knowing about it.
So why don't we see those people, the people we see every day as a mission field? Why don't we see our coworkers, our classmates, our town as a place to serve and impact for Christ? Why do we think only of Africa or China as places that need God?
I think it's because it's easier to minister to strangers than to our friends. It's harder to mark ourselves as Christians and have to walk it out every day than to go to a place where we know no one and are leaving shortly.
I fully support foreign missions...but I encourage us all to support neighborhood missions. To be a missionary every day. Like my church taught last year-- Every Believer is a Minister!
16 Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. 17 When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. 18 Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
Matthew 28:16-20
All nations. Even ours.
For students, this is a time off of school. For adults, this is is a time of a break from the work force. As such, it's a time for missions. Many college groups I know are sending students abroad to do Christmas missions in foreign countries. They want to spread the Gospel to people who need it. They want to tell people the true meaning of Christmas, to show God's love to people that need love, and are more willing to receive it at this time of year.
One of the ONLY things that bothers me about this concept is the idea that people feel the need to leave the country to do that. Foreign Missions are an amazing thing, and I love seeing students sacrificing their precious time off of school in order to bring people to Christ. I think it's amazing to know that people are willing to walk into perilous conditions to spread the Gospel, and my prayers go with them. If I had money, it would go with them too.
However, sometimes I feel as if our churches focus more on foreign outreach than on neighborhood outreach. The mission field, our mission field has been defined as a place that is far away. To do 'missions,' you need to have the funds, the time, and the desire to travel. I don't necessarily agree with that. I believe that our mission field is right here. I take the same bus to school every day. I stand at the bus stop with the same people, every day. For fifteen weeks, three times a week I have stood next to the same girl, and I have never said a word to her. Why not?
I go to the same classes, with the same students every day. I see the same people and I even have conversations with them. And yet, I don't know if they're struggling. I don't know what they go home to. I don't know if they cry themselves to sleep every night, or if they're dealing with loneliness, depression, or achoholism. I don't know how many of them feel neglected by their parents, or are surrounded by things and yet feel like there's something missing.
I don't know how many of them don't know the true meaning of Christmas. I don't know how many of them truly are willing to receive Christ... And I've never asked. I feel like we often assume everyone has heard of Christ, knows what Christianity is, and has already made up their mind. What if that's not true? What if they never were exposed to it? You can know something exists without fully knowing about it.
So why don't we see those people, the people we see every day as a mission field? Why don't we see our coworkers, our classmates, our town as a place to serve and impact for Christ? Why do we think only of Africa or China as places that need God?
I think it's because it's easier to minister to strangers than to our friends. It's harder to mark ourselves as Christians and have to walk it out every day than to go to a place where we know no one and are leaving shortly.
I fully support foreign missions...but I encourage us all to support neighborhood missions. To be a missionary every day. Like my church taught last year-- Every Believer is a Minister!
16 Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. 17 When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. 18 Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
Matthew 28:16-20
All nations. Even ours.
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